RANTING AND RAVING!

1) American Idol tonight was totally bullshit. Ryan Seacrest told the first row of guys that they just had to sit and relax and then after going through the whole line of guys from the other row -- went back to the first row and just named a guy who was the loser of the night! Anyway, I didn't explain that well but it was DICK MOVE. If Ryan asked me if I wanted to sing one last time I would say: No thanks. How about you just go f&*@ yourself and that will fill the last 3 minutes of the show. PEACE OUT.

2) John Mayer BLOWS ASS. Daughters is the biggest JOKE. And then it won the Grammy for best song of 2004. The message is: if you are a white guy, you can put out any SHIT and you can win a GRAMMY. (Sorry, Kanye. Maybe next year. Especially since your diction was better than John Mayer even when your JAW WAS WIRED SHUT.)

Here is my tribute to Daughters because it truly is the worst song I have ever heard.
I know a girl = over 50% of the population is female
She puts the color inside of my world = without her I have a vision problem
and she's just like a maze= she is an obstacle for mice
Where all of the walls all continually change = like the display windows at the Gap

And I've done all I can = I've tried nuthin' and I'm all out of ideas
To stand on the steps with my heart in my hand= I love cliches
Now I'm starting to see
Maybe it's got nothing to do with me= "Its not you, its me."

Fathers be good to your daughters = family harmony is preferable
Daughters will love like you do
Girls become lovers who turn into mothers = children should have children
So mothers be good to your daughters, too= everyone else is doing it

Ooh, you see that skin = you have a dandruff problem
It's the same she's been standing in= that is deep like snow
Since the day she saw him walking away = which was onset by stress
Now she's left cleaning up the mess he made = maybe a broom will help

So fathers be good to your daughters = family harmony is preferable
Daughters will love like you do
Girls become lovers who turn into mothers= children should have children
So mothers be good to your daughters, too = everyone else is doing it

Boys you can break = this is not a song about sons
You find out how much they can take = i will try to get a Grammy for my next song entitled Sons-- do you think they will fall for it twice?
Boys will be strong and boys soldier on
But boys would be gone without warmth from a woman's good, good heart

On behalf of every man, looking out for every girl
You are the god and the weight of her world
When you have a daughter be good to her because some day when some other man has his mid-life crisis and is looking for a 20-something year-old he will want a girl whose father loved her so much that she became a lover

So fathers be good to your daughters
Daughters will love like you do
Girls become lovers who turn into mothers
So mothers be good to your daughters, too = Three CHEERS for redundancy!
So mothers be good to your daughters, too = Three CHEERS for redundancy!
So mothers be good to your daughters, too = Three CHEERS for redundancy!